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4 Beautiful Reasons Why Tantrums Are Not At All Bad

We surely don’t want to be trapped in a dreadful situation when our toddlers cry heavily, scream their hearts out, and lie down kicking on the floor in the middle of a solemn celebration or in the midst of happy social gatherings. But tantrums can just happen anytime most especially during the most unpredictable moments.

Despite the dread characterizing tantrums, I urge you to see the positive side of this seemingly uncontrollable behavior. Here are some of the most beautiful reasons why you should accept the normalcy of tantrums:

1. Tantrums relieve your children’s emotional stress.

What do you feel when you are harboring resentment in your heart? How heavy does your soul become? By knowing how toxic containing our emotions can be, then we can better accept the need for our children’s cries.

These little kids need to have an avenue for venting out their emotions. When we force to stop them from telling us that they are extremely upset or discouraged, then we also allow the further growth of stress hormones in their system. Tantrums are our children’s way of showing that their immature hearts cannot contain the sadness that they feel.

2. Tantrums make your children normal human beings.

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Do you agree that we live in a sometimes cruel world? Most people expect us to be happy at all times and behaving at our best even when situations are terrible and awful. Some parents are even shamed and criticized for dealing with stressful situations in a manner that deviates from society’s high expectations.

Tantrums only prove that our children are normal human beings – they can lose their cool, they can be overly sad, they can feel rejected, they can be disappointed, and they can show how they are without being constrained by what other people could think of them.

3. Tantrums let your children accept boundaries and manage rejections.

If you managed to not buy everything that your children asked you to buy at the mall, then congratulations! If you had the courage to get the handful of candies and chocolates from your kids, then great! You are doing the right thing as a parent.

Most children throw tantrums because of certain triggers such as not having what they want or being stopped from particular activities. Since they haven’t developed to their full maturity yet, we can expect that tantrums could be their means to overcome rejections.

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When your children throw tantrums because of these reasons, resist the urge to suddenly change your mind. Don’t give in to their demands. Instead, allow them to cry but offer a soothing embrace. This will soon let them know that throwing tantrums is not the answer to their disappointments.

4. Tantrums give you a parenting challenge.

Challenges are nice to have from time to time. But what’s good in dealing with tantrums is that it tests your patience and stimulates your empathy towards your children. But with every circumstance, you have the responsibility to rise up victorious from all challenges. And victory is not measured when your child stops from crying. Victory is determined by how you dealt with the problem and how you were able to show your love even during the most stressful situations.


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The Importance of a Regular Routine to your Child

via The Importance of a Regular Routine to your Child

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Regular schedules provide the day with a structure that orders a young child’s world. Although predictability can be tiresome for adults, children thrive on repetition and routine. Schedules begin from the first days of life. Babies, especially, need regular sleep and meal programs and even routines leading up to those activities.

As they gets older, when a child knows what is going to happen and who is going to be there, it allows them to think and feel more independently,  and feel more safe and secure. A disrupted routine can set a child off and cause them to feel insecure and irritable.

Dinnertime is a great place to start setting a routine.  Sitting together at the dinner table gives children the opportunity to share their day and talk about their feelings.  This is also a great time to include some responsibility in your child’s routine, such as helping to set or clear the table.

And regardless of how exhausted you or your children may be, don’t be tempted to skip winding down from the day.  This is part of a nighttime ritual and allows both child and parent to decompress after a busy day. It also helps bedtime go more smoothly.  This is usually the time of day when parent and child can spend some quality time together, so fight the urge to start the laundry or do the dishes until after the child has gone to bed.  If this isn’t possible, consider trading off these duties with your spouse each night to ensure your child has quality time with each parent on a regular basis. Take the time to find out what wind-down strategy works best for your child.  Some children are actually energized instead of relaxed by a warm bath, so if that’s the case with your child, bath time should be saved for a different time of day. Whatever routine you settle on, make it quiet, relaxing, and tranquil for everyone.

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And though routines are essential, there should be some room to be flexible as well.  You might be out late at night on a family outing, have unexpected company show up that may result in a skipped meal or nap in the car while running errands in the evening.  In these instances, it’s important for you to keep your cool. If you express frustration or anger about disrupting the routine, your child will as well. Prepare children for such unexpected events and show them that though it can happen from time to time, the routine will return the next day.


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THE SACRED “O” – OBEDIENCE AMONG YOUNG CHILDREN

How is your parenting so far? Can you easily let your child pick up the toys that are scattered on the floor? Or are you having difficulty in terms of teaching her the concept and practice of obedience?

We all know that parenting is a challenge. If you think that the most difficult stage is when your child is still a newborn baby, then you could be underestimating the gravity by which your naughty toddler or your extremely curious child can pull your own energy down to the lowest.

To make parenting a lot easier, we need to develop the character of our children. After all, their character will also be a big factor in determining their future success.

Here are helpful tips to teach obedience to your young children:

1. Model Obedience

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The best way by which your children can learn obedience or any other values in life is through observation. It is almost impossible to teach your children something that you cannot do yourself.

So how do you model obedience? Are you supposed to obey your children like they are your bosses? Definitely not!

Modeling obedience can be done by following the laws of the land such as traffic regulations. It can also be seen when you strictly follow your house rules such as no television watching at certain hours of the day, no wearing of shoes on the carpet, and no junk food. Whatever it is that you want your children to do, you must also be willing to show them the act.

2. Get on a Talk

If you want your children to brush their teeth, you cannot simply order them to do so. You need to explain the importance of brushing their teeth.

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Get on a talk. Make sure that they fully understand the need to do a certain activity. Explaining things to them will make them voluntarily do something without questioning the purpose behind their obedience.

3. Be Firm & Consistent

Children draw on patterns. Their behavior usually develops according to the patterns that they observe at home, in their neighborhood, or in their preschool.

You will need to be consistent in your rules so as to develop predictability among your children. You cannot restrict them from shouting at you when you allow them to talk horrendously with other people.

You also need to be firm with your decisions. Once you have proclaimed that junk food must not be eaten during meal times, then do not be swayed by their tantrums, sad faces, or constant pleas. Sudden change s in your decisions can give them the impression that it is okay not to obey because you will change your mind anyway.

4. Offer Consequences

TP09_StepsToddler11Consequences in obedience training are not only about giving punishments but also about offering rewards. It is important to plan your punishments and rewards. You cannot be random about these in order to make sure that your emotions won’t get in the way of proper discipline.

Rewards can be in many forms. It can be as simple as outdoor play, a cone of ice cream, or an hour of swimming. On the other hand, consequences can also come in various forms such as limited playtime or keeping away of their favorite toys. Just make sure that the punishment isn’t harsh or detrimental to their development.

5. Examine Yourself

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Look at yourself as a parent. Are you imposing standards that are almost impossible for the age of your children? Do you get annoyed by their normal behavior and misbehaviors? As a parent, you need to have a heart and mind that are full of understanding, patience, and love in order to help your children grow to their fullest. Have some room for mistakes. Be gentle with your kids because it is through lovely and positive discipline that you can help them embrace obedience as part of their character.

 


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FUN YET SIMPLE ACTIVITIES FOR TODDLERS 18-24 MONTHS

Once your child goes beyond a year old, she will be exploring so many things in her surroundings. It is the time when she would try to sneak into your kitchen and open the cupboards herself. It is the dangerous period when she would climb up the staircases and leave you breathless.

So how can you keep your baby busy on safer and more meaningful things? What are the best activities that you could give her during this stage?

To help you get through this time successfully, I have listed five of the best ways to make your 18-24 month old baby happy and busy:

1. Ignite interest with picture books.

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Picture books are a real gift to the learning journey of our children. Most of the picture books that you will find in the bookstores and markets are of various themes and ideas. You can pick a book about shapes where different items that resemble certain shapes are shown so that your child can be familiar with them.

The toddler stage is the perfect time for your kids to embrace the fun in learning. It is ideal to introduce her to new words and concepts through the use of picture books.

2. Develop curiosity with wooden toys.

The use of wooden toys is promoted by the Montessori education. Contrary to plastics, wooden toys are safe for your kids. Just make sure that the wood has been painted with non-toxic materials.

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There are different kinds of wooden toys out there. The best wooden toys for children below two years old are those that can introduce geometric concepts and patterns. It is also nice to give her a wooden xylophone because music can intensify the cognitive development of children.

3. Stimulate creativity with art.

Boy, drawing a picture for fathers day

You might be surprised that your toddler can already create wonderful art even at her young age! Just allow her to hold a non-toxic and washable crayon with a piece of paper. See what she can randomly create! Do not forget to capture her creations through a photograph. There are also jewelry makers who can transform your toddler’s first doodles into a pendant for you to keep forever.

Other art ideas include tracing her hands using colorful and washable markers on a piece of paper, painting her toy box, making a DIY paint using a yogurt, or putting some stickers on a surface. Remember to be forgiving during this stage. There is no point in being so strict about cleanliness. Let her be messy to explore all areas of creativity.

4. Promote fine motor skills with play.

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You should not wait until her preschool years before you even attempt to consider the development of your child’ fine motor skills. You can check out the internet for some cool ideas about fine motor activities. One sample activity is the insert pipe game. Just get a used cardboard box, empty its contents, and create even round holes on the box. Then cut small pipe cleaners which your child could insert into the holes.

There is no need to spend so much on the toys of your baby. You can make do of whatever there is at your home. Be resourceful enough and enjoy the process.

5. Explore sensory capabilities with experiments.

Aren’t experiments fun? You don’t need to be a scientist just to let your child feel awesome about them! One experiment that you can do is the bubble fun experiment. Just get an empty bottle, fill it with water, pour some shampoo into it, add some food dye, and shake. Prepare three different colors to make things a lot more exciting. Your child will surely be amazed by the resulting bubbles!

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Another experiment that you can do is the simple pancake experiment. Create a pancake and add interesting toppings like mallows, nuts, syrup, and more. Let her get one topping at each time and ask her what she feels. Explain the idea of color, texture, taste, and flavor.

Enjoy every step of your journey to parenting. The toddler stage can be exhausting but it can also be extremely fun and meaningful for as long as you delight in little joys.


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4 Effective ways to Get Your Kids to Stop Whining

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It’s irritating, it’s frustrating and it gets on your last nerve. Though it’s obnoxious and unacceptable, it’s actually effective for your child to get your attention. It’s whining. But, like other bad habits, you can nip it in the bud early with a few simple strategies to teach your child there are other appropriate, effective forms of communicating with you.

  1.  First, try limiting the situations that trigger it. Avoid extra errands when the kids are hungry.  Don’t let them get involved in a frustrating game or project prior to bedtime. Pay attention when your child is talking, as sometimes whining is a reaction when a child feels you aren’t giving them your full attention. Praise them for not whining and talking in a normal and understandable voice that allows you to fully understand what they are saying to you.
  2.  When the whining begins, don’t overreact. Keep your response simple, calm and neutral.  Ask your child to repeat the request in a normal tone. When giving in seems inevitable, don’t delay. If you must finish the grocery shopping so you can put dinner on the table, for instance, and your child starts whining for a snack, offer something healthy right away.
  3. Once a limit has been set, parents should follow through. It’s imperative that both parents are on board with this limit and fully follow through when the whining rule has been violated.
  4. If you have an older child that’s developing a whining habit, suggest they come up with a solution to their perceived boredom or other voiced problem.  If you suggest possible alternatives, it might just prolong the child’s whining.

Sometimes whining can be the result of trauma and trouble in their life. A divorce, serious family illness or problems at school may be at the root.  Additional positive attention and quality one-on-one time may be just the medicine your child needs at a time like this. Your pediatrician can also suggest alternatives to curb whining should the positive attention and disciplinary actions be ineffective.


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