The two previous posts on positive parenting dealt with the whats and the whys… Now let us jump into the hows or the techniques by which we can effectively implement the approach. After all, what is theory without practice, right?
Here are some of the proven tips in raising happy and successful children using the theoretical and practical foundations of positive parenting:
1. Manage Behaviour with Clarity
What does it mean to enforce behavior management with clarity? This is basically about being able to let your child understand the reason for certain rules and the expected consequences from breaking such rules.
Toddlers and young children are inquisitive creatures. They do not simply do what they are told without knowing the underlying reasons for it.
For example, if you want to prevent your child from going outdoors in the rainy season because of the health dangers associated it, then you could set a mini meeting with her. Be creative in your explanation so that she can easily understand.
2. Implement Rules with Transition
Are you strict with mealtimes? Most parents would have difficulty following a strict mealtime most especially when their children are so hooked into playing. An effective way to get children easily co-operate is by considering the transition from playtime to mealtime. How do you do this? Give reminder signals.
Reminder signals are a good way to remind your child of the need to cooperate to certain rules. Know that your child hasn’t fully developed her mental capacities yet. Rules can easily be forgotten when faced with enjoyable circumstances. A positive method of enforcing rules without risking the development of tension is by providing reminder signals.
3. Frame Your Instructions in a Positive Manner
How often do you find yourself saying the word don’t? Millions of parents across the globe have made it a habit to frame their rules using negative words without realizing that these could actually be confusing to the developing minds of young children. Wouldn’t it be a lot easier to say what your child should do instead of what she must not?
For example, instead of saying “Don’t mess up your room,” you could actually reframe the instruction into, “Put back your toys on the shelf after playing.” By doing this, you have clearly set the instructions to your child without causing confusion about what is expected of her.
4. Work on Your Own Mood & Transform Your Perspectives
If you are really serious about positive parenting, then you should expect to be doing a lot of work on yourself. Positive parenting heavily relies on the ability of the parent to see the world in a positive light and to be able to control negativity in both thought and action.
Your child won’t always have a great day. There are times when she would get upset by a friend who may not share toys with her or be afraid of new events such as her first day in school. The way she reacts to these circumstances can be significantly influenced by your very own views of adversities and challenges.
Remember, light can easily radiate outside. So if you see the world positively, then you can also share the same perspective with your child.
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