Sorry to burst your bubble, but here is a shattering truth: not all attention is good! Although we always hear the popular advice to give attention to our children, it is very seldom that we are given the reminder to offer positive attention.
As parents, we need to be mindful of and intentional on the kind of attention that we offer our kids. Not because we are physically present can we assert the rightfulness of our parenting act. We need to make sure that the way that we interact with our children can be considered as belonging to the positive attention category.
To help you give your best foot forward in this parenting journey, let me offer some of the most helpful tips to use positive attention so that your kids can develop fully, happily, and optimally:
1. Offer the warmth of your smile.
How often do you smile at your kids? When you get home from a stressful day at work, do you still manage to show your smiling teeth or do you bring the frustration from your job to your living space?
2. Give your hugs even during tantrums and trying moments.
Managing toddler tantrums and dealing with constantly crying infants can truly exhaust you. Some parents have a tendency to shout at their kids who give them difficult times. It is not enough to just stop your kids from crying. What is important is that you show your affection during the moments when they are emotionally down. Offer them hugs instead of just verbally asking them to wipe off their tears.
3. Listen to your children’s stories.
Children who are only learning to talk can be quite annoying for some people. Although they could be generally cute, some people cannot stand hearing repetitive words and noisy expressions. As a parent, never should you have the same attitude such as theirs. Enjoy this phase. Be patient even when they are stuttering. Encourage them to articulate their thoughts well by helping with the formation of words and sentences.
4. Set your bonding activities together.
Do you know that a lot of kids consider their bonding activities with their parents as some of the most precious moments of their life? Create a routine with each of your children. Even when you have dozens of kids, make sure that you can set aside a few minutes with each one to perform a special activity.
5. Discover their gifts and interests.
Our children have their own talents, abilities, and interests. Have an effort to discover what it is that your children want to do. Exploring these things with them can reinforce your relationships.
These tips seem to be trivial, right? Despite their non-complexity, they are very important in your parenting journey. Here are the reasons why positive attention can help your children:
- Positive attention can build your children up. It can help them have confidence with their own selves and have the courage to explore their capabilities.
- Positive attention can conquer all their hidden fears and create a safe haven for growth. Emotional security can prevent depression later on in their lives.
- Positive attention creates wonderful surroundings that can make your children feel a lot happier and more fulfilled.
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